What Was I Thinking? Ch. 02

I felt my mind fading. Then Nick started to move in and out of me. He was fully inside me and just moving his monster cock around. I could swear that my organs were rearranging themselves to accommodate this massive intrusion.

'Full' was the only word my mind could conjure.

"Are you alright?" Nick asked. "Does it still hurt?"

I couldn't even form a word. But yes, it did still hurt.

I vaguely felt him wipe the sweat from my brow and kiss me as he to settled into me. Into my ass. This was Nick's show now, he could pretty much do anything he wanted to me.

Its unclear to me why or how other people allow, indeed enjoy such a huge intrusion inside their bodies.

The power of a massive dick is incredibly underrated.

With my legs around his waist I felt every movement of his body as he began fucking me.

With every press forward, I could feel the air being forced out of my lungs. My ass was no longer the issue here. He was controlling my ability to breathe and it felt like he had complete mastery over my body. I realized that I didn't care anymore. I relinquished all control to him.

This big man on top of me, using me to fulfill his sexual desire and it felt like he was killing me. The driving force and energy that he put into me was unbearable. Then I remembered how it must feel on his end, from his point of view.

Soon I felt his hands behind my knees and he was moving in and out of my body at will. I realized that I couldn't stop him even if I wanted to. He had me nailed to the floor and was plowing my ass like a man on a mission.

I don't remember when the pain stopped, I just remember thinking that I was just happy to be able to breathe.

Nick's massive cock was dominating every aspect of my being as he hovered above me, holding my legs wide.

In and out, the pressure, then the lack of pressure. I had no control over it. The pain, the pleasure of it. I don't remember it ever feeling like this before. I couldn't understand if I was angry with him or if I was happy. The problem is that I had no control.

Then Nick leaned down into me. He began thrusting hard and uncontrollably, like a dog humping a leg. I realized that he was working toward his orgasm and that idea made me want nothing more than to get him off.

Nothing fires the imagination more than a man working toward orgasm. It's a hot and terribly exciting thing.

I couldn't stop my hands gripping onto him or my hips thrusting back into him as he drove deeper and deeper into me. I could feel his fat cock each time as it seemed to swell and knock into me.

All of a sudden I couldn't understand what I was feeling. I just knew that I couldn't get off fast enough. I couldn't take my hands off him. I needed him desperately as my asshole clamped down on his massive cock.

I drove my dick into his stomach as he unloaded inside me. The only thing keeping me from floating off the floor was weight of his body. Yet I felt like I still couldn't get close enough to him.

I grabbed and clutched at him like I thought he might be trying to get away. I couldn't believe how strong this orgasm was. It seemed that it would never end. I didn't want it to end.

When it finally did, I couldn't let go of Nick. I wouldn't let him move.

"I need to get up." He said plaintively.

Still I held onto him.

When I finally did let go of him and he stood up, I saw the red and raw looking marks on his knees.

"Dude, I'm sorry." I laughed, feeling guilty about having caused his condition.

I am more than familiar with rug burn than I care to be.

"Why?" He asked looking down at his raw knees. "I'm not. It was worth it."

Later, after ordering some snacks from room service and taking showers we lounged around on the sofa looking out at the sky.

"I still can't believe you have this kind of money." Nick mused.

"I don't know what to tell you." I shrugged with his head in my lap. "When I was poor, or more accurately, when I was living paycheck to paycheck, I always imagined that I'd want a lot more things. But then, when I could afford a lot of things, I found that I didn't really want as much stuff as I thought I did.

"I mean at first, I did go a little crazy, but then I realized that I was just collecting things that I neither needed nor really wanted.

"Most of the stuff just sat around collecting dust. The only things that I really wanted were the house I have and you."

Nick actually blushed and I felt him pull me a little closer to him.

"Although my Jeep Wrangler is important too. I have to confess that I get a new one almost every other year.

"A simple man with simple tastes." Nick leaned down and kissed me. "I like that."

It was my turn to blush.

"I only have to restrain myself when it comes to new CD's and books. Oh yeah, and new computer equipment." I confessed. "I used to like new clothes, but I have no patience for shopping anymore. I buy clothes only out of necessity now."

"Then why are you always trying to buy clothes for me?"

"I know. I'm sorry, but it makes me happy." I admitted. "Still, I haven't done it lately have I?"

"No and don't get the wrong idea." He stroked my neck. "I appreciate the sentiment. It just feels weird."

"I know." I replied nodding sympathetically. "But, we do have a little problem here."

"What?" He eyed me suspiciously.

"We're gonna need clothes for tomorrow." I ventured.

"Not if we leave now." Nick countered impassively.

Nick's face, posture and voice were all very calm and without emotion as was his way sometimes.

"You know, you sometimes remind me of 'Tom Ripley', from the Patricia Highsmith novels."

"So you think I'm an opportunistic sociopath?" He asked. "Does that excite you?"

"Maybe."

"Anyway, don't you mean the movie?" He asked.

"No, I read the books." I lied.

"No you didn't. Otherwise, you'd have them proudly displayed in your collection at home."

"Okay", I admitted. "I only saw the movies, but there were several of them and I watched them all."

"Yes, good job." He condescended. "So can we go home now?"

I love the way he always calls me on my bullshit. But I can't admit defeat, so I torture him a bit.

"Yeah!" I scoffed. "That's not going to happen. Especially not with that attitude."

"So I am a hostage then?"

"A hostage in a luxury suite? Well, only if you see it that way." I laughed. "Beside, what kind of hostage gets to stay in a nice hotel like this, with room service at his beck and call?"

"Yeah, this is nice." He smiled, softening a bit. "Well, what did you have in mind?"

I smiled up at his acquiescence.

I ordered a car and we went out shopping. Nick seemed a little embarrassed and uncomfortable, but he quickly got used to it.

"How long did you mean to keep me hostage?" Nick asked in the back of the limo.

"That's up to you."

"Okay, well, I have to be back at work tomorrow. Do you have also have a private jet to get me back in time?" He asked facetiously.

"No. I don't. But its funny that you should ask." I said. "I have something to confess."

After having bought him many expensive things that he politely rejects I think I know his mindset.

But of course, at some point it will probably be necessary to tell him that I've already bought controlling interest in the corporation that owns the bar that he works for. I guess now is as good a time to tell him as any.

It started out innocently enough. At first, I just bought his boss's franchise to enable him to get time off. I just wanted him to have a day off when he wanted it. His boss told me that the only reason they that were even above water was because of Nick.

The girls just love him and some of the guys too.

After some advice from my financial analyst I bought the place.

"I own your bar."

"What does that mean, you own my bar?"

"I just wanted you to have a day off when to."

"So basically, you co-oped my life?"

"Yes."

"You're a control freak." Nick said, looking away from me and walking toward the glass doors that peer out over the city.

"Yes." I nodded feeling less in control by the second.

"You did this for me?"

"Yes."

"Well, can I ask a favor now?"

"Of course."

"Stop doing things for me." Nick said turning to face me.

"Alright!" I nodded. "But I only did it because..."

"I know why you did it..."

"I love you." I said.

"I love you too." Nick said looking more sad than loving.

"I think you're amazing."

"Uh huh, I know."

I turned and walked away from him. I was tearing up and I didn't want to seem like the douche bag who cries at the drop of a hat.

Nick followed me and smacked me in the back of the head.

"Ow, what the fuck?"

"Don't ever walk away from me after declaring your love for me."

"Okay..." I laughed looking back at him and rubbing my head where he smacked it.

Then out of nowhere, Nick dove into me, driving me forward and to the floor. His grip was super strong and hugged me to him.

"Don't ever mistake my words or posture for

I decided not to press my luck.

"What's say we go out see some to of the sights?"

We took the Jeep and I brought him over the Bay Bridge to have a look at Alameda which is where I used to live.

I was thoroughly disappointed to find that the Naval Air Station that I'd once called home was now defunct. It was mildly depressing to see it so desolate and empty.

Over drinks in a bar on Webster Street, Nick tried to console me.

"I thought you were in the Marine Corps?" He said.

"I was, but the Marine Corps is a department of the Navy and depending on your job or Military Occupational Specialty, its more than likely that you'll be stationed somewhere with the Navy." I explained.

"So, this is where you lived?"

"Yeah, more or less."

I gave Nick the full tour of Alameda as I remember it. Then I drove us up to Berkeley where I went to school.

"Now, this place I know." He said. "We used to come up here all the time to party."

Berkeley is a unique place in my mind. Somehow I feel that I belong here. There's something about the atmosphere that always makes me think of the sixties and the seventies, the music of that era. The hippies and beatniks and all of the civil unrest and upheaval of that time. For some reason, I feel like this is my real home.

"Perhaps you lived here in a previous life." Nick offered.

"Yeah, you believe in that kind of crap?"

"I don't know?" He shrugged. "Maybe."

"Do you wanna drive down to Stanford?" I asked, remembering that was his alma mater.

"No." Nick scowled. "There's nothing there but a school. This place is much cooler."

We spent the afternoon in Berkeley. Later we drove back across the bridge and I took him to the Castro. That was huge mistake.

I nearly got into a fight after a guy tried to proposition Nick with a drink and an offer to go home with him.

"Dude you don't get it do you?" Nick said. "I'm not attracted to guys. I'm attracted to you. Seriously, if this thing between us should end, its not very likely that I'd ever end up with another guy."

I couldn't decide if that was a good or bad thing.

"You never have to worry about me leaving you for another guy or anyone else for that matter." He assured me. "This thing between us is about you and me, not sex or anything else. Its just us."

I nearly cried at those words. Instead I hugged him and held him close to me.

---

Late one evening Jason called from jail. I went down immediately but of course they made me wait hours and hours before I was actually able to get him out. Drunk driving and resisting arrest. Nothing life too altering, but still bad.

"Are you alright?" I asked after we got into the car.

He just nodded.

I knew he wouldn't be in the mood for a lot lectures and recriminations, so I kept quiet.

He looked miserable and depressed. Tired too. I reached over and put my hand on his shoulder.

"Listen, I was little hard on you before and I'm sorry." I offered.

He looked over at me, tears welling up in his eyes. I hate it when people cry. I focused my eyes straight ahead. I started thinking about what Nick had said before.

"So, do you love him?" I asked. "Jorge?"

"Oh man, not this again." He laughed bitterly, wiping his eyes. "What do you care?"

"I don't." I said. "How did this end up me against you?"

"I don't know."

"I mean, aren't we friends?"

"I suppose."

"If we are, then let's start acting like it." I said.

"You seem to only have Nick these days." Jason complained. "I mean we used to do everything together."

"No we didn't." I smiled.

"Well, you know what I mean." He grumbled.

"Okay, duly noted." I said. "And I'll try to work on that. But you gotta remember that he is my boyfriend. And I won't have you undermining and sabotaging my relationships. Understand?"

"Yeah." He said, a little resentfully.

"Come on Jason, you know I love like you were my own brother, but I'm in love with Nick." I told him. "And even if I weren't in love with him, yours and my relationship would still be the same. We're not ever going to be lovers. I told you that way back before I ever agreed to let you come live with me. Nothing's changed."

"Yeah, I get it already." He snapped. "And I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk to me like I was ten years old."

I took a deep breath and tried stay focused.

"Okay." I said. "So is this how its gonna be?"

"What?"

"The attitude, the hostility." I said. "Cause I can really do without that."

Pulling up to his apartment, I sighed resignedly.

"I'm just tired. A little hung over. I'm sorry."

"Its okay." I said, hugging him. "Give me a call when you feel better we'll do something, alright?"

"Yeah, okay." His voice breaking. He was on the verge of tears again, head hanging.

"Its gonna be alright." I said, stroking the back of his head. "You wanna come back to the house and sleep in the loft?"

He nodded.

---

"You wanna go see that new movie on Friday?" I asked Nick.

"Can't. Playing a gig with 'Chaos Factor' on Friday."

"Chaos what?"

"The band, remember?" He said. "You wanna come to that instead?"

"Right, okay." I said. "Yeah, that sounds like more fun than what I was planning. What happened to the lead singer."

"Rehab."

"Ah." I nodded. "Too bad. When'd they start calling it 'Chaos Factor'?"

"Don't know."

"Oh, you don't mind if I bring Jason, do you?"

"Cool with me." He shrugged. "You should see who else you can get to come. Maybe some of those people you work with."

"Alright, I ask around."

---

Jason and I met Scott and Julia at bar. We found a table and waited for the show to start.

"Hey Scott, hey Julia." I greeted them. "Oh and look, you brought Marisa. Hi Marisa."

I glared at Scott and he shrugged sheepishly, like it had been beyond his control.

"So Craig, Marisa has been wondering why you haven't called her lately." Julia said.

"What happened, did Marisa lose her ability to speak as well as my number?" I chided Julia.

"Now Craig, you know very well..."

So how've you been Craig?" Marisa interrupted, smiling at Julia.

"Not bad." I grinned my most charming grin, as we all took a seat. "A little busy, but not bad."

Scott and I exchanged quick glances as Marisa squeezed in next to me.

"Well, we'll just have to have the two of you to dinner sometime." Julia insisted.

Again, Scott and I exchanged quick glances.

"Drinks Craig?" Scott said, getting up quickly. "Let's go up and get a round."

Jason seemed oblivious, looking around the room as if he himself were waiting for someone to arrive.

"Dude!" Scott exclaimed as we approached the bar. "What are you gonna do about Nick?"

"Nothing." I said. "What's to do? I swear, you're like a little kid. Are you getting some kind of weird, twisted thrill out of all this?"

"No, I am not." He frowned. "But you know how nosey Julia is. She's like a prosecutor, if she thinks I know something, she'll give me the third degree until I break under the cross. She's gotta know everything about everybody. I just want you to be prepared."

"Look 007, or should I call you 'Q'? I'll handle it, I'll tell her he's staying with me for a while since his place burned down."

"Yeah, that's good. Very good." Scott said excitedly.

"It's the truth, you moron." I laughed.

"Even better." His eyes gleamed with excitement.

"Dude, you're certifiable. You know that, right?"

Nick and the guys put on one hell of a show. He was dressed in tight leather pants and a t-shirt. He looked every bit the rock star. More importantly, he moved and sang like one. He was damn sexy up there. He looked as if he'd been born to do it. I, like everyone else was simply overwhelmed by his stage presence and charisma.

Between sets, he came over to our table. I quickly introduced him to everyone and they all seemed suitably impressed.

"Uh Craig, a quick word?" He said motioning toward the back. "Nice to meet you all."

He took me back to some storage room in the back where we made out feverishly.

"Dude, aren't you afraid we're gonna get caught?"

"Maybe. Maybe not." He shrugged. "Are you?"

"A little, yeah." I chuckled.

"Don't sweat it, this is what they gave us as a dressing room. No one's allowed back here but the band."

"Well, what if one of them comes back?"

"What, Kurt and Jack? I don't think they'd care. I've caught them mackin' on each other a few times.

"Who the Asian guy?" I asked astounded.

"Yeah and the black guy."

"What are they a couple or something?"

"I don't know what they're doing." Nick said. "I think they just like the way each other looks. They are both pretty hot looking dudes."

"What about the other guy?"

"Huh." Nick scoffed. "Oblivious. I don't even think he knows he's in a band. He's so self-absorbed, I think he believes that we're just stage props for his showcase."

"Now, back to you." Nick said, smooching me wetly again. "So who was that little honey, all up in your grill?"

"What?" I asked, completely taken aback. "Since when did you start talking like Snoop Dog?"

"Its all part of the persona." He shrugged.

"I see." I smirked, unconvinced. "Anyway, that was Marisa. She's friend of Julia's."

"Well, tell her to back off. I ain't havin' no nonsense up in here tonight." Nick said.

I just busted out laughing.

"What? Too much?" He laughed too.

"Maybe just a bit." I said still chuckling.

"Oh well, I gave it a shot." He smiled, pulling me closer.

We made out for a little while longer, then I went back out front. He went back to onstage a few minutes later.

When the band broke into their rendition of one of my favorite artist's, Josh Kelley's' song, 'Amazing', my head swiveled toward the stage.

This a little known gem of a song, that doesn't get as much play- time on the radio, as I complain to Nick a few days ago. Nick's voice and the band's talent perfectly recreated the song as it is on the compact disc.

I could clearly see Nick looking in my direction at the bridge of the song. At least I hope he was.

After the show everyone stood around congratulating him and the band on their fine performance. I was beaming with pride for him and more than a little sexually aroused by the sight of him with groupies, both male and female, hanging around vying for his attention. It was strangely erotic to see so many people, mostly young girls, adoring him for his considerable talent. And probably for the considerable package he was showing in those leather pants.

That night in bed, we made love like it was the first time.

---

Finally, I got Nick to agree to a weekend camping trip with Scott and I. It was all planned and we had everything packed. Nick had to manipulate his work schedule a bit so that we could leave on Friday afternoon, which meant that he to do multiple closing shifts this week. But he didn't seem to mind.