by Rediger
Great story and I too agree with the comments below you finished the story perfectly.
Me, I think it ended at the right place, Leave'Um wanting more.
anything more would become trite and run of the mill
Wonder about Jacob and the beads,
Maybe there is a spinoff there
Needs another chapter. This could actually happen, maybe they'll have children...
First of let me say that this is a good read. Better then some I have read.
My only critiques are that the characters a bit one dimensional and the dialogue seems a bit forced in places. The bones of a really good extended story are here and there are places where the story can be expanded. A lot of potential in this.
Really liked it. Good writing and story. I rarely read stories more than 2 pages but yours kept me going. Keep them coming.
This is a great story that makes you believe in Love, Magic, Fate and Human nature again. After you finish reading it you just want to say " I Believe I Believe" without caring about the looks from the other people in the room ars giving you.
rocking story........fast paced.......great wrk.........plz keep writing
Simply put.....a cinderella story with sex......something we all wish we had!
Well written, wonderful development of the main characters, exciting, sexy, in a word EXCEPTIONAL!
Please write some more stories.
I loved this. It was very well written with great details. Awesome job, and I look forward to more stories by the same author, wither they take part from this story or not.
sO LUCKY: tO HAVE ONES FORTUNES REVERSED BUT A SIMPLE ACT OF KINDNESS.
My acts involving saving animals but this guy was tru;ly lucky