by Optimator
This story got me all misty... loved the way u showed us the 'what if' scenario...
Awesome story! So deep and powerful.
It's never a good idea to let love slip away.
Just wanted to pop in and say a quick thanks for all the feedback and comments. I've written a bit more about this story on my blog at:
http://upstatekinkybastard.blogspot.com
Talks about where the story came from and why I had a difficult time with the ending.
Again, thanks for the kinds words.
Opt.
Thank you for a wonderfully thought provoking story.We only ever have one life and choices are(for good or bad)part of it.
I concentrated most on the ending, mainly because I've been one to let the best potential partners walk away. Yeah, it's my fault too. Went though one really bad relationship and never allowed any woman to get under my skin ever since.
Thanks for a story that really held a mirror up to my eyes, which is now leading me to rethink my self imposed isolation.
I'm sure this is my fault, but I don't understand this story. The 82 year old man at the beginning has a son named Michael, and a wife that has been dead 5 years. But the man at the end has no living relatives. Is everything in this story just a dream....a dream as to what could have been? If not, did I miss something somewhere?
Sack, late at night with small brain
I really enjoyed this story. It shows how the choices we make influence our entire lives.
Your story has a lot going for it. But, while I hate to toss out negativity, it also has a lot of confusing POV shifts in that last section. But that's a craft deal. With study and practice, you'll overcome that. No one can teach creativity and that's your strength. Keep up the good work.
Rumple
Not following the same kind of storyline as the other ones, this one is very involving and very intense. After readind this story, even i called my girlfriend and my parents to tell them that i loved them.
very good story...very thought out!
Excellent story line...reflections of the past felt like now~<grin>
I liked the way you linked the memories together and then the shift at the end...great!
Your ability to transition from one thought to another is amazing..this story had a flow to it that kept me reading. This story especially hit home for me, since I work in a hospital, and have taken care people who had no family..it always leaves you wondering. Absoulutely thoughtful, compelling..leaves the reader to really asses what is important in life. I love this!
Your story was held that kind of real, honest, painful truth that we often shy away from as a society. Thanks for digging this open and holding it out for us to take a good close look at. Read it a couple of weeks ago and it keeps coming back into my head.
It has been quite some time since a story has moved me the way yours has. Thank you.
It's remarkable how much you can see through someone, with words. :)