All Comments on 'A Holiday Wish. . .'

wistful tale...endearing and erotic...<grin>

Good Luck and Happy (safe) Holidays~

^5 Art~

incomplete sentences and other strange things (the asterisks) took some enjoyment out of this tale for me. A good editor could make this flow better, and thus improve your score. Good luck!

This was just...bad. It was rife with punctuation mistakes, commas in the wrong places, periods in the wrong places, neither where they're supposed to be. It could have had much more charm if you'd taken the time to develope the characters a bit more, make them more palatable to the reader. And I would suggest finding an editor next time to help you with the structure of the story.

Geeze I wonder if these picky people even read any of the story. Please you just pick to pick, you must love to complain

Warm and erotic. Good luck with the contest EW.

The beginning of the story line was great but you kinda jumped into the sex part with out introducing the characters. What was the hurry anyway?

I liked it alot.

What is it with the vicious people? Excuse me, vicious COWARDS who cannot leave their names.

This was a short story, of course the sex was jumped into quickly, we cannot all write novellas all the time. Get over your anonymous selves!

Emerald

Maybe folks are remaining anonymous so they don't have to deal with insults because they express an honest opinion?

I understand now percisely why my art teacher didn't give me an A. You can't reward flaws, and there are many here. I'm saying this not to be mean, as so many of you automatically assume, but in the hopes that this author will try harder on her work.

Take pride in what you do and strive to do the very best you can. If you're not sure how to structure something, find an editor or someone who can help you. Don't rush and don't try to jump into something for the sake of a contest.

Maybe... Maybe it is because it is those people in the forum whom I have ruffled their feathers. No how silly of me to think such a thing huh? They are to mature, You on the hand must really like my work and are just too cluster fucked to admit it huh? Why else does your name keep showing up over and over? Need to change your message your sounding boring now.

kisses baby

No need to critique... it was a fun story that brought to mind a fantasy we've all had about that jerk of a neighbor/co-worker/in-law who's just attractive enough to make a little crazy...

What a lovely story, every womens fantasy... very nice blend of love and lust.. well done my friend *hugs*

What sex was to fast? I read erotica to get off not to linger on for the sex, it was good just enjoy people for crying out loud.

yes short, but very hot

... find an editor. Please? Pretty please???

You improve with each story and I should know I have been reading them from the very first one.

A good quick fix! Enjoyable! ~~missygail

get another hobby!

You do as well, suck me please?

Needed more dialog. Haring her say fuck is what we want