All Comments on 'Spring Cleaning'

I like this and have mentioned it on the New Poems thread on the Poetry Forum. It has such a gentle flow of remembrance that you might wish at sometime to rewrite some of it and replace the more sharp/realistic descriptives like the condom falling off, or the love handles, with softer images. Or, you could go just the other way and stick in some more reality bumps among the reminiscence. It is a very good poem for a first post.

I disagree with the previous post's advice about the advisability of softening the sharp descriptives, etc. To my mind, that comment betrays something of a lack of sensitivity to the edge that the whole poem has, even at its softest moments, leading up to the final line's "move on" wish. It's a beautiful, yearning piece of work, with its lyrical moments and carefully chosen details working hand in hand. I really liked your story, too, and really look forward to the sequel that the latter seems to promise.