All Comments on 'Choose'

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annaswirlsannaswirlsover 19 years ago
~

I like the tone of internal conversation shared. I get a feel that this poem kind of runs away with itself--

I am not sure if this adds to the mood of decision or not? Maybe with its internal dialogue it works to feel rushed, but if you want to become more centered on the decision, you might try to make the reader feel a part of it in the structure of the poem. More line breaks. Pauses.

Just some brainstorming, ignore what doesn't work please :)

LeBrozLeBrozover 17 years ago
~~

Flip a coin, I don't want to choose ~ so saying, you've made a choice ~ I'm a coward and want someone else to choose.

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