- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Winter
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winter
snow on the branch
the cat sleeps
- COMMENTS
Anonymousabout 18 years agoI really like the way this (short) poem provokes images. Those few short words brings back memories of winters past.
DJ
WickedEveabout 18 years agoI'm hardly qualified to comment on a haiku. It's been ages since I wrote one, and I still need to learn more about them.
I like the poem. I wouldn't use "the" twice in a haiku. "the cat sleeps" doesn't have quite enough impact.
Anonymousabout 18 years agoI really like haiku poetry, and I think this is what you're aiming for here. It didn't pull me in like I expected it to. I would love to see you expand a little. Maybe do the 5, 7, 5 counts. I believe it would work out better, and you could add more details by doing so.
Thanks for sharing, and keep writing! :)
