still

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81 words
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Part 1 of the 2 part series

Updated 03/16/2021
Created 01/26/2004
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Cordelia
Cordelia
11 Followers

I.
holding onto
the breath I should have
used
to tell you

your words
paint upon my monotonous sky
a crescent moon
spilling
fog onto skyline’s jut

but I wait

exhaling so softly
water doesn’t
know


II.
in case you missed the way
my hair
insinuated itself

and don’t recall the taste of rosemary

I’ll untie me
from your cerebellum

reminders are
forthcoming

here
I
am


III.
nothing to do
but condense comfortable conversation

heat

pull the moist
leaving

essence

Cordelia
Cordelia
11 Followers
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  • COMMENTS
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7 Comments
TheDR4KETheDR4KEabout 20 years ago
moments

I really enjoyed the minimalist nature of this work -- the feeling of glimpses, moments, fragments of memory caught in a breeze, tied together only with a common word.

AngelineAngelineabout 20 years ago
Well, you did it again Cordie!

wrote an artwork of a poem that conveys your sensual, painterly vision. I got to this--

your words

paint upon my monotonous sky

a crescent moon

spilling

fog onto skyline?s jut

and gave you the five, lol. The pacing is perfect, too. And I agree with Jim, the "Still" is alluded to in both form and content. Do you think your sense of pace has been affected by doing live readings? Anyway, ever wonderful dear lady.

xo Ange

AnonymousAnonymousabout 20 years ago
It's a beauty

of a write. I do enjoy reading your work. I echo Ice's words.

jthserrajthserraabout 20 years ago
Very nice...

the unspoken "still" beginning each part, yet all parts united in the flow. Well done.

jim :)

IcingsugarIcingsugarabout 20 years ago
Woah

It's really hard to write a good public comment while speechless. I say no more.

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