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Click hereThat's my story, my lessons learned – some too late, of course, that being the nature of lessons. Can they be summarized? I think so.
Don't betray love.
All we are trying to do, in the end, is find love. People pursue sex, drugs, religion, material possessions, and fame, but what they are truly seeking is love. Just a little bit more, they think, more sex partners, more crack, more piousness, more stuff, more fans, and they will finally fill that void in their soul. It doesn't work. Only love can do that.
You betray love when you dehumanize or objectify sex, take advantage of others, mislead others about your intentions and feelings, and – most of all – when you fail to embrace love, even though it is right in front of you, waiting for you with open arms.
Again I must quote Laura Hollander from my story "A Lifetime in One Moment." I wish I could have understood the depth and power of what she was saying. I suppose I had to learn for myself.
"Love first, then everything else."
- COMMENTS
fainting_goatabout 2 months agoExcellent advice and poignant vignettes of your life to drive the points home. Good honest writing. I hope people who read this benefit from your mistakes and heed your words. I appreciate your blatant honesty and sincerity with this piece. Good stuff.
Anonymousover 4 years agoWe can find inspiration anywhere , though my search for smut brought me here.
But this is an awesome story on all counts . In the longer run , we know our heart knows the truth .
Sex is temporary , love is forever . I have lost , so i know .
Anonymousover 7 years agoThis story is heartfelt, eloquent and the writer a true stoic. To be a good man is hard, hard work, but you give me hope I am on the right path. For the previous commenter who called the author a prick, at least he had the integrity to feel guilt over his actions and share the lessons accumulated throughout his life. Not only did he feel remorse but he defined one of his misadventures as leaving "a lesion on his soul". I can empathize greatly.
Thank you for your story sir.
Sampkyangover 7 years agoWhat a horrible jerk asshole of a guy to hurt so many women in a horrid way. He deserves absolutely NOTHING!
Anonymousover 8 years agoI read this essay maybe 10 years ago, I was moved and loved every word of it. Now a decade later I started reminiscing about life and remembered this story all of a sudden. I can say with certainty that it is still as powerful if not even more powerful than I first read it. Just the thought of someone like Beth makes my heart sink, I dont know how but I feel heartbroken every time I read that part. I also feel intense dread every time I read the Eva story, every word getting closer to where you just lose everything. I hope I'll remember your lessons when I'm in that position. The stories of Eva and Beth will haunt me forever, as they haunt you.
elrayo41almost 9 years agoCONGRATULATIONS. You are truly a gifted story teller. This essay captures the imagination and creates suspense almost like a thriller.
Of course, it helps that you are right on in your opinions of women and of love relationships. I wonder if these concepts apply equally to same-sex relationships?
Any way -- WELL DONE.
Thanks for sharing.
Anonymousalmost 11 years agoI like to think I write well, I'm articulate, that I have something to say. Then I read this, and I realize that I should just shut the hell up and instead listen. Thank you for your wonderful essay, and for sharing so eloquently the lessons of your life. I, too, greatly regret that so few people will get to hear what you have to say. I have two relatively young nephews, and although it's taking a chance, I'm going to make sure they read this. Thank you again.
Jay
SuadelaPeithoalmost 11 years agoI never even noticed it was long. All I knew was that I wanted more, to read more and well like when all great reads come to an end, I felt bittersweet knowing I had finished. Thank you, for your insights and for sharing your lessons learned. Who knows how many more lives you've profoundly touched and possibly have sparked a change.
On to technicalities! Needs to be edited, a few misspelled words and wrong usage here and there. Otherwise, incredible writing. I felt as though we were talking over a bottle of beer on a nice warm night and connecting as two souls. Huh well imagine that lol
Mankind needs to read this. All. Of. Mankind. Oh and about being the next great American novel author, let me know how that goes. I will certainly be on the lookout.
