- Non-Erotic Poetry
- When I Can't Sleep
Note: You can change font size, font face, and turn on dark mode by clicking the "A" icon tab in the Story Info Box.
You can temporarily switch back to a Classic Literotica® experience during our ongoing public Beta testing. Please consider leaving feedback on issues you experience or suggest improvements.
Click hereI understand everything:
the edgy curve of your back,
unsettled legs tucked too neat
for slumber and worry times
breath equals tension
squared in our tiny room,
the blue oasis. We dream
an isle of safety in this
sea of ice. Uncertainty
is nothing to insomniac
hearts attended by stolid pines,
the brightening sapphire sky
and keytaps that comfort
you. Every space you occupy,
even the gaps of absence
are filled: your scent,
the dip in a pillow, your watch
draped with my necklace.
I can't explain the depth
of this falling nor measure
the radius of its secrets,
only fit locked within it,
one piece of the puzzle,
a fleck in the pupil
of your restless eye.
- COMMENTS
WickedEveabout 18 years agoSorry to just now be commenting. I totally missed this poem, Ange.
I agree about gaps of absence.
Maybe a line break between gaps and of?
f-cynyrabout 18 years agosome excellent lines. 'gaps of absence' is ,just stunning. very powerful image.
My Erotic Trailabout 18 years agoa paramount poem that reaches the soul where fingers can not go. excellent poem grasshopper
bogusbrigabout 18 years agoBeautiful.
The only thing that jarred with me a little was 'gap of absence'. For some reason I can't quite put my finger on it doesn't seem right. A small thing in a really good read.
Anonymousabout 18 years agoThis poem was mentioned in the new poems review thread inspite of the reviewer. *froggy tongue emoticon*
LeBrozabout 18 years agoWell.......
Excellent read here.
If pressed, I might concede that perhaps
The 3rd strophe should have a period at its end
And the first word of the 4th be dropped (you),
So that it starts, "Every space..."
sackabout 18 years agomight read better without the "you" after comfort. Too many "yous"!
