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Click hereYou taint this body with unbidden, binding
tabletop thoughts. Spread out
a leisure morphing of partially taken pathways
teeth sinking bites, into the bountiful boudoir
of coy glances interceded in the exchanging
of secret blushes. I follow your patch
of sprinkling hair to the rivers edge, while I sup
and gather liquid courage to forgo it all
and just feast on you forever.
Your words paint vivd and evocative images.
Rhymeville must be quite a place.
Great stuff, Heather, good use of imagery and your language has a nice musicality to it.
love and hugs
V/D
xx
nice write (~_~)definitely an excellent literary journey <grin you would win altmania with this write <grin, I had no idea it was your poem (~_*)
well-chosen, well-ordered ajectives/phrases; very seductive indeed! Nicely done!
This is great and I love the allusion to an instant message conversation. You've made me hungry and I can't wait to feast on my bountiful spread.
.....love this poet for the strides she's made. This is simply lovely.
Tess
I don't really care for alliteration, despite that, this poem had me following it to 'rivers edge.' My favorite line is 'a leisure morphing of partially taken pathways,' though it seems like a coma after pathways might help.
BD
Fairy girl. This is good. This poem shows and doesn't just tell. You show images. You leave wonderful clues to what's going on, like with your phrase: tabletop thoughts. Your words lead up to the feast.
This line is a standout in the poem: "bountiful boudoir of coy glances." Even the word bountiful has the reader thinking feast.