Produce Man

But what a moment it was, nice work.

but what an excellent poem. I'm smiling big!

A nice simple snapshot;

Those typos do distract tho...

I found your poem to be witty and funny, my favorite type of poems <grin...nice write and congrats

except for the shitty ending. sandspike

I really like your poetry. I think this one is especially good. I would, however, take out both "the" and "so" in line three as well as fix the errors TRM noted. If you prefer to keep both words, I think the fourth line should begin "he reminded" rather than "reminding."

damn it.

thanks for the comments..

I had never read any of your work and the E made me take notice, Im glad!

Despite the minor errors already listed, this is a terrific poem. I love it. And it really says something about human expectations, doesnt it? excellent work, keep it up:)

maria

...while suggesting you repair a comma error.

Should have been -

brilliantly = brilliantly,

. . . adding a comma was my suggestion, not for you to spell 'brilliantly' wrong, as I did. :)

I need more coffee. :rose:

Good, sharp poetry.

There are surely edits needed, to repair errors and inconsistencies. . . they stand out because of the poem's brevity.

"Jim" = "Jim."

brilliantly = brillinatly,

unknow = unknown

Your work is always sharp, and this is no exception.